[00:00:01] Speaker A: Welcome to Faith Break. Finding God moments in your everyday. Each week on Faith Break, hosts Karen Luke and Ann Gallagher bring spiritual refreshment to your daily life.
On Today's episode for February 2, 2025, Karen and Anne and special guest Sarah compare adult and young adult perspectives on ministering in today's church.
[00:00:36] Speaker B: Hi. Welcome back to Faith Break. I'm Karen.
[00:00:39] Speaker C: I'm Anne.
[00:00:39] Speaker D: And I'm Sarah.
[00:00:41] Speaker B: Sarah is our special guest today and we are going to be talking about the youth changing the world.
[00:00:48] Speaker C: So Sarah has been a member of our faith community for many years, very active in our youth ministry since middle school. And this year she is a high school senior, second semester senior. And she took so many AP classes in her junior year that she has a ton of free time in her school schedule.
[00:01:08] Speaker B: I don't know what that was like.
[00:01:09] Speaker C: So she is serving as our student intern in youth ministry and faith formation this year.
[00:01:15] Speaker B: So we are going to hear good thoughts.
[00:01:17] Speaker D: All good thoughts. All good thoughts.
[00:01:19] Speaker B: And share some God moments that we have in our lives.
So, Sarah, do you want to start us off or would you rather.
[00:01:26] Speaker D: Sure, Sarah. So my God moment from this week was on Monday when I convinced my little sister, who I normally can't convince, to do anything, to drive with me 30 minutes to a different YMCA to take this workout dance class that my aunt teaches. And it was the most amazing thing ever. And she got in the car and she goes, I'm never gonna go back. But I'm really happy we went. And I was like, well, I'm happy I convinced you to come. So it was fun.
[00:01:52] Speaker B: So it wasn't. It wasn't like zoom Zumba?
[00:01:55] Speaker D: No.
[00:01:55] Speaker B: Do you know the name of it?
[00:01:56] Speaker D: Okay, don't make fun of me. But it was called this work dance class, but it's spelled W E R Q.
[00:02:03] Speaker C: Nice. Nice.
[00:02:05] Speaker D: It was just. It was very fun.
[00:02:06] Speaker B: Awesome. I love that.
[00:02:07] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:02:08] Speaker C: That's so cool. I feel like it is hard for you to get your sister to do things with you.
[00:02:14] Speaker D: Yes.
[00:02:14] Speaker C: But she must be realizing that you're gonna be leaving soon. She's gotta make the most of it for the day.
[00:02:19] Speaker D: Cause she's not gonna get her driver's license until like six months into her junior year. So no one's gonna be able to drive her to school. So she's been really cherishing our time in the car. Like, she's gonna hate me for saying this, but like, we've been singing along to songs every morning, getting hyped. Like, it's one of the my favorite things.
[00:02:36] Speaker C: It's gonna be hard for her to go back to the bus next time.
[00:02:38] Speaker D: Yes. Yes. I feel bad. I feel bad.
[00:02:41] Speaker C: Aw. I love that you had that moment with her. You wanna do yours next? Sure. Should I do mine?
[00:02:47] Speaker B: No, I'll do mine. So again, ebbs and flows of the day. Weeks, months. But the other day, it was after dinner and it was mass chaos in the house. Of course. It always is. And I just sat on my bed and I grabbed my Bible and Ann and I exchanged Christmas gifts.
[00:03:09] Speaker C: Yeah. We knew we needed to talk about this moment at some point.
[00:03:12] Speaker B: Yeah. And we both got each other a gratitude journal without knowing.
So I pulled that out and I have this other workbook that I've been working on and I just spread them across the bed and I shut my door and I put my earbuds on to King and Country and Emma busts in the door and I'm like, I'm praying. And she's like, oh, sorry. And shuts the door. And then Connor bust in. I'm like, I'm praying. But it was like, usually I don't take that moment when everyone's awake. So it was like, it was great.
[00:03:45] Speaker C: Sometimes it doesn't take like you don't need an hour to do that. Sometimes you just need like five minutes. Like it's like grown up timeout or something.
[00:03:51] Speaker B: But it was just like, I just, I knew that for me to be nicer and just. I just needed that moment. So thank you, God for providing.
[00:04:01] Speaker C: Awesome.
[00:04:01] Speaker B: And what is yours?
[00:04:02] Speaker C: So mine is. It's not so much a moment as like a collection of moments this year. But I wanted to. I was thinking about things I felt really grateful for.
And I want to acknowledge our ninth graders, don't you think? Because we have.
So we run a confirmation program that's mostly eighth and ninth graders. And in addition to all our confirmation classes, we also require that the teens attend their appropriate youth group like four times over the course of the year. Which is, you know, like just. It's a requirement for the, for the program. But this year we have a whole lot of ninth graders who are choosing to come every single week. That's awesome. Or at least most weeks. And like they're, they're just. Their conversation is so honest and they're really engaging. Don't you think? This group of ninth graders, they're awesome to have.
[00:04:52] Speaker D: They're definitely very vulnerable, which you don't get very often, I think especially just walking in. And it makes it a lot more fun. Cause I don't have to talk as Much so it makes your job as.
[00:05:02] Speaker C: A leader a whole lot easier when people are willing participants and engaging. But. Yeah, so I just want to hold them up and give them a shout out and the parents a shout out and.
Yeah. Grateful to see what God does with them for the next three years.
[00:05:18] Speaker B: That's awesome. Planting the seeds.
[00:05:20] Speaker C: Yep. Okay, so Sarah is on to be our, like, spotlight on the Young church today. We thought we would do, like, a Q and A where Karen and I could ask you some questions and you could ask us some questions, and we'll just try to, like, have a little conversation. So do you want to ask a question first or do you want to receive a question first?
[00:05:39] Speaker D: You can ask me a question first.
[00:05:40] Speaker C: We're going to ask you a question first.
[00:05:41] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:05:42] Speaker C: Okay. I'm gonna ask you. Why did you want to do an internship at our parishes your senior year and spend this much time volunteering in all of our programs?
[00:05:52] Speaker D: Yeah. So I definitely have been very involved, and I'd always, like, go to all the other things. And I was like, wait, I have time in my schedule that I don't really want to take this random class that I don't really need. I'd love to spend it doing something that really matters to me and is important. And I don't go to a Catholic school, so you don't really get to spend a lot of time talking about things like that. And so I chose to do it because I'd be doing the things anyway, so I might as well get to get more immersed in what I was doing. But you guys are also awesome people, and I would not do it with anyone else. Genuinely. I don't think I would have. The thought would have even crossed my mind. So I'm really happy I've been doing it. I was reflecting on it this past week when I was looking at the questions, and it's definitely something I'm really, really grateful I've been able to do, because I originally was like, maybe I want to go into youth ministry because you guys set such a good example. But then I was like, no, I don't think that's what I want to do. But I'm happy that I got to experience it. And I definitely. I've been thinking about going to a college that has a minor in theology, and it's definitely something that I'm seriously considering. So I'm excited.
[00:07:00] Speaker B: That's awesome.
[00:07:00] Speaker C: It's been so awesome having you around for all of our programs this year. We're going to miss you a whole lot when you cross.
[00:07:05] Speaker D: I know. I felt bad. I was like, wait. I feel like I'm taken on so much that now, like, I don't want to give any of it back because I don't want. You guys have to do it.
[00:07:12] Speaker C: It's going to be hard. This is like a side question, but do you want to talk about what you. About what you think you might want to do with your life?
[00:07:18] Speaker D: Yes. So I'm definitely going to go for nursing, and I hopefully will end up getting my nurse practitioner's degree somewhere somehow. I haven't really thought about it much, but I'm still trying to decide on a college. There's just so many different things that go into making that decision. And some colleges have great nursing programs, but they're not really rooted in the Catholic teaching and social justice, which is something that's really, really important to me because I'm not going to make money. Like, that's not what I'm planning on doing. So I'm just really excited. So, yeah.
[00:07:50] Speaker C: Awesome. I think working in churches is giving you a good crash course and, like, just dealing with all different kinds of people, which I think, as a nurse is going to be a skill you're going to really need to have, too.
[00:08:00] Speaker B: And it doesn't mean that you can't still volunteer.
[00:08:03] Speaker D: No. Yeah.
[00:08:03] Speaker B: So that's awesome. Because you still have your passion. Well, both passions, but one is more of a volunteer passion. Instead of saying, oh, my gosh, I'm not gonna do any of it. I would have been scared if you were like, yeah, I'm not even gonna volunteer. I'm done. Totally.
[00:08:19] Speaker C: No, for sure. Okay. Do you wanna ask us something?
[00:08:23] Speaker D: Yeah. Wait, where am I here?
[00:08:24] Speaker B: Where are your questions?
[00:08:25] Speaker C: Where are your questions?
[00:08:27] Speaker D: Thank you. Okay, so one thing that I was brainstorming is we always talk about how the church is just so complex, and there's things that you might not disagree with, but you always have to figure out how to get through it. And I guess for me, I was wondering, what's one thing you guys would change in the church if you could?
[00:08:44] Speaker C: And when you asked us, we were like, how are we going to not get in trouble? No, just kidding.
[00:08:48] Speaker D: Not at all.
[00:08:49] Speaker C: Not at all.
So it was kind of funny. But once I got past that initial thing, I was like, you know, I think what I would change is all the people in it.
Because, like, what makes church hard, putting aside, like, doctrines and things like that, it's just like, the people in it are all sinners.
All of us are. And so it's really messy. It's messy to be part of a community where there's all different kinds of people. They have to come together and be in relationship and are supposed to love each other. And, you know, we know how often we fall short in our even. And we have a great parish, but even, like in our parish, you know, all these meetings we have where maybe not everybody's always at their best all the time or.
Yeah, but that's why we have a church.
[00:09:40] Speaker B: Right.
[00:09:41] Speaker C: We don't have a church for the. For the holy people. We have a church for the everybody. And that made me think of this quote from Pope Francis.
Have you heard him talk about how, like, the church should be a field hospital for sinners?
[00:09:52] Speaker D: Yes.
[00:09:55] Speaker C: So I. I dug that whole quote out, and I just want to read it. He said, the thing the church needs most today is the ability to heal wounds and to warm the hearts of the faithful. It needs nearness, proximity. I see the church as a field hospital. After battle, it is useless to ask a seriously injured person if he has high cholesterol and about the level of his blood sugar. You have to heal his wounds. Then we can talk about everything else.
Heal the wounds, and you have to start from the ground up. And that's like, just such a. An awesome model of church and, like, what I want it to be. Because I think the other thing that frustrates me about the church a lot is that it can be a lot more about, like, maintaining.
[00:10:36] Speaker D: Yes.
[00:10:37] Speaker C: Yeah. The structures and the status quo and the way things have always been, and less about the mission, you know, more about, like, I mean, our church. I don't think our church is very judgmental, but some other churches might be judgmental. And I think people are afraid the church is going to be judgmental and, you know, kind of nitpicky or puritan about things. And, like, we're here. We should be healing. We should be healing. We shouldn't be telling people they're not good enough or they don't believe the right things first. We have to do relationship and healing.
[00:11:11] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:11:11] Speaker C: And share the love of God and everything else can follow, but that's gotta be the core. I wish we did a better job at that. How's that?
[00:11:20] Speaker B: I think for me, I would change how parents feel about themselves in the church because we all bring our baggage or our unknowns. And I would love for it to change where I am, the person that gives resources instead of the person that teaches. I want the parents or grandparents, anybody, to own their faith and feel comfortable and confident.
To spread that and to teach others and not have it be such a.
This is what you do, and this is what I do.
And then I would also change, like, the sports on Sundays, but that's not really the church.
[00:12:12] Speaker C: It's not really about the church. It's about everything else. But I know just because I'm a.
[00:12:16] Speaker D: Buffalo Bills fan, I'm still a Buffalo Bills fan.
[00:12:19] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, I am. But I'm talking about, like, Sunday morning, 8:00, soccer practice type of thing, or hockey and just making parents feel like they have to choose between their face or a sporting event for their kids.
So I just want parents to love it as much as we do and want to share it and feel comfortable and confident to do that.
[00:12:50] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:12:50] Speaker C: Nice.
You want to ask another question? Is it your turn? No, it's not my turn to ask a question.
[00:12:58] Speaker B: It's my turn.
[00:12:58] Speaker C: You ask Sarah.
[00:12:59] Speaker B: It's my turn.
[00:13:00] Speaker D: Sorry, I didn't throw that at you. I'm sorry.
[00:13:04] Speaker B: It's been quite some time since I've been a teen.
What is it like being a teen today?
[00:13:13] Speaker C: Such a big question.
[00:13:16] Speaker B: I mean, I'm not that much out of my teens. Well, yeah, I totally am.
[00:13:20] Speaker D: That my. Not at all.
[00:13:22] Speaker B: I would.
[00:13:23] Speaker D: I'd say, like, it's very similar struggles that I feel like you guys had. It's just different.
I think being a teen, you just have so many things going on, like, especially with technology. Today, I'm gonna get up on my high horse and say this. There are people that can talk to you, like, in, like, one second, and you can have six different conversations going on. And it's just very difficult to stay present and in the moment when there's so many things happening.
And obviously I go to a school where it's very much like going to college and getting into a good college is what is your focus. And I don't regret anything that I've done in what I've chosen to do. It's helped me become who the person I am. And I think it's really important to push yourself. But I think the culture of today is that people push themselves too far and that becomes a problem.
But one thing that's been really helpful to me and that I've talked to countless people about is my faith. And it's very much like a thing that you have to prioritize, which is very difficult when you have an AP Gov test the next day and you have six hours of homework and you have a job, but there's youth group, and that's where I want to go, but is that where I should go? I've definitely made youth group is where I go to procrastinate, which isn't good, but that's where everyone is. Everyone's feeling the same.
[00:14:46] Speaker C: There have been a lot of nights. You're like, I can't come tonight. I have too much homework. And then I see you, and then.
[00:14:50] Speaker D: I show up and answer is like, you need to go home.
[00:14:52] Speaker C: No. I have never once told you to go home from youth group ever.
[00:14:56] Speaker D: Well, you never say that, but I feel that way. I'm like, I know. But, yes, I think it's definitely something you have to put first. And one thing conversation that I think about a lot when I'm thinking about my teenage years is I was talking to my assistant principal, and she was going through. I, like, had been absent for some reason, and she was like, just want to make sure we were good. And I was like, no, I was at the National Catholic Youth Conference. Like, I was having the time of my life. And she used to work for a Catholic school. And she was like, one thing that I wouldn't tell other people, but I'm going to tell you is that all the teens that have all these problems that I talk to don't have a faith. They don't have God in their life. And that's something that I wish a lot more people had because it really helps you get through all the things that you're going through and are able to do what you're doing. And it's just something that I've always thought back to, especially because I feel so happy and I have such a great life. But there's always things that God is here for you for. And.
[00:15:57] Speaker B: Yeah, I remember when I was going, like, junior, senior year. Actually, it wasn't until senior year, getting ready for, like, looking at colleges and everything.
There was no push, like, from my counselors. I applied to one school.
[00:16:14] Speaker C: Wow.
[00:16:15] Speaker B: I looked at.
[00:16:16] Speaker C: Okay, hold on.
[00:16:16] Speaker B: I looked at one school, I applied, I was accepted, and that was that. Like, it's. So it's. How many? Okay, not to put you on the spot, how many schools did you apply to?
[00:16:28] Speaker D: I think I ended up applying to, like, 10 or 11. And I'm on the low side. Most of my friends applied to at least 18 schools.
[00:16:35] Speaker C: I might apply to, like, 12 schools.
[00:16:37] Speaker D: Seriously.
[00:16:38] Speaker B: Maybe it was just where I went. I'm not gonna say where I went, but.
[00:16:41] Speaker C: And, well, you end up transferring, too.
[00:16:42] Speaker B: Though, after a semester.
[00:16:44] Speaker C: Right.
[00:16:44] Speaker B: That's how great that was.
[00:16:46] Speaker C: You ended up where you were meant to be.
[00:16:47] Speaker B: I was. Yeah.
[00:16:48] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. Do you think when you look at your peers and stuff, like.
Like, what do you think are some of the biggest, like, challenges that teens today are facing?
[00:16:59] Speaker D: I would definitely say feeling overwhelmed. There's a lot expectations. A lot of people have a lot of expectations. I've been really lucky because my dad's always like, I'm not pushing you to do anything. But I know a lot of other people have parents that are like, if you bring home this grade, like, you can't have your phone. And I'm like, that is not how my life works. And I'm really happy. But I do think another issue that is definitely very prevalent is mental health. It's definitely something that I've struggled with, other people struggle with, and it's very difficult just because of how many things are going on. People really struggle to put themselves first over other relationships. And so that's definitely something that I think is difficult.
[00:17:43] Speaker C: Yeah. And the phones, too, like, you mentioned. Like, just. The phones are a great grandma. No, no, you don't. Like, the phones are a great thing, but they're also, like, everywhere.
[00:17:51] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:17:51] Speaker C: So finding that balance is, I think, really something we didn't have to deal with when we were in high school. Or, like, everything being recorded and there forever. And, like.
[00:18:00] Speaker B: Yeah, well, even just after school, like, I would come home and I would do some homework or go to soccer, do some homework, and then I'd have the night. It was not.
I don't feel like it was as structured or that I felt like I needed to have so many things. Clubs, under my. For my, you know, school.
[00:18:26] Speaker D: One thing I wish I would have known is there's only 10 slots to put on your common app for clubs. And all of a sudden, yes, there's only 10 slots.
[00:18:35] Speaker B: And how many? I was gonna ask.
[00:18:38] Speaker D: Oh, I. It was like, six or seven that I was like, you know what? This isn't worth it. I don't care about that. My internship was, like, six or seven, and then, like. But, like, there was. You just have to. It's so difficult. I wish I would have known there was only 10 slots. Cause I would have prioritized other things.
[00:18:54] Speaker C: Different things. Oh, my gosh. Yeah.
[00:18:56] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:18:57] Speaker C: That's good to know.
[00:18:58] Speaker B: Stressing me out. And I'm not even in school anymore.
[00:19:01] Speaker C: Yeah. All right, now you get to ask us something else.
[00:19:05] Speaker D: My other question is, what has been the most influential moment working in youth ministry, and how has that shaped your perspective today?
[00:19:14] Speaker C: Why don't you go first?
[00:19:16] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:19:16] Speaker C: And I'm gonna steal my cheat sheet faster.
[00:19:18] Speaker B: All right, go first.
So we've always.
I think, like, one of our themes, Ann, has been, like, planting seeds.
[00:19:27] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:19:27] Speaker B: And sometimes, like, we don't see the fruitfulness of it.
But I think one.
One story that, like, really stuck out was there was a kid in my youth group, and he did not want to be there, like, at all. Made it known. Not only made it known to his friends, but was just.
He knew how to get under my skin, like, and it was bad. Like, I would leave youth group, and I'm just like, why? Why am I doing this? Why? You know, all this stuff? And he ended up graduating and moving away.
And this was probably about. This was before COVID actually. And then last year, I got a text from his mom asking if he could call me, have my phone number to call me. And I'm like, well, is he 18? Cause I can't talk to him.
[00:20:25] Speaker C: And she's like, he's 24. He's 24.
[00:20:27] Speaker B: I was like, where did that four.
[00:20:29] Speaker C: Years just live by?
[00:20:32] Speaker B: So, anyway, long story long, he reached out to me, and he apologized for how he acted and how he behaved and how he realized all of the stuff that I was trying to do was just get him to be in relationship with God. And on campus, he started going to the Newman center and was starting to, like, just be himself, like, who he was meant to be.
[00:21:03] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:21:04] Speaker B: And I think that that has kind of shaped me because for as frustrating as kids can be or parents can be, you know, about things, it's not about me and not about a program, not about a specific session, but about the overall goal and mission.
[00:21:27] Speaker C: And I love that it wasn't, like, a memory you had that went really well in youth group. Like, it was something that surfaced years later that you never would have thought would be, like.
[00:21:38] Speaker B: No, no. It was a lot. But, I mean, again, the age that I was, I was closer in age with him.
Do you know what I'm saying?
[00:21:49] Speaker C: Because we started.
[00:21:49] Speaker B: But we started when we were 20.
[00:21:51] Speaker D: You were telling me this last night. You were like, yeah, Father Mike said whatever to me. And I was like, oh, my goodness. You were like a baby.
[00:21:59] Speaker C: I had my first interview to be the youth minister. I worked with him at a different parish before I came here. So this was like. I was in from my dorm room. It was a phone call from my dorm room when I had my first interview. Yeah. So the kids, when I started, they were only four years younger than I was.
And now they're, you know, and now.
[00:22:19] Speaker B: There'S a lot larger.
[00:22:20] Speaker C: Right?
Not at all that were your parents age.
No.
Yeah.
[00:22:27] Speaker B: So, yeah, I think that just influenced me, like, just knowing that even the hardest kid got a seed planted.
[00:22:35] Speaker C: I had a really hard time picking, like, a single moment because I feel like there's been so many, like, ups and downs over the years. And I also feel like I started in ministry. Like, even back when I was in high school, I kind of, like, I didn't have an internship, but when I was in high school, I did.
Our diocese had. They were starting something called the Diocesan Youth Committee, which was sort of like a leadership committee for all the teens in the diocese. And there was a guy at the diocesan office who became a big mentor to me. His name's Michael. And he was the one who, like, really called me into ministry. So even from, like, my sophomore, junior, senior year of high school, I was, like, leading church events, you know, as.
[00:23:12] Speaker B: Part of diocese and retreats that I went on. So, like, Ann and I. I don't remember.
[00:23:17] Speaker D: I remember this story.
[00:23:18] Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, there's gotta be some pictures.
[00:23:20] Speaker C: Of us and there must be. I remember meeting you when you were in college. That's when I remember meeting you. And I was like. I was like, I don't know, a year or two out of college. Cause we're only like three years apart, but, yeah. So I had a hard time picking a specific moment. But I was kind of, like, looking back over the years. And I think one of the things that Michael told me early on, like, when I was in high school, is like, he thought it was his job to ruin my life because he wanted to make it so that I could never make a choice that didn't involve my faith. Right. That, like, my experience of church would be so life changing that, like, there would be no going back from it. And I think that's really what happened to me in high school.
And, like, I just was so blessed to have all these, like, mentors and people who, like, really took me seriously and didn't, like, I don't know, because I went through a lot of difficulty, especially my senior year, like, with home stuff and money stuff. And there was just a lot of trauma in that time of my life. And it was really the people in the church who lifted me up and kept me going. And so I just really wanted to live a life where I was giving that back to other people. And it was really cool, too, because then when I came back out of college, like, four or five years later, a lot of the Same youth ministers who were, like, my mentors in high school were still around. And so then I felt I was part of, like, the big kids table kind of. And they were so welcoming. Like, even the bishop was, like, super welcoming. When I was a baby, youth minister would have all these diocesan gatherings of ministers, and he'd be like, ann, come sit with me. And, like, it was just like, the church to me was just like a place where I felt completely at home and where I felt like I was being invited into important work. And it's just shaped my whole life, right? So I had a really great foundation to start from. Now that I've been in it for two and a half decades. Like, it's hard for me to look back and pinpoint, like, specific moments. But I can say that there have been tons of highs, like at NCYC or the Search retreat, where we see.
You see teens get it, you know, like, you see that you can sometimes see the moment where they understand how much God loves them or that God's calling them to something, and those are just amazing. But then we also get led into people's pain and suffering a whole lot, which is.
It's its own kind of grace, but it's very hard as well. So I would definitely say that some. Some of the most meaningful moments over the years in ministry have also been the most difficult because they've been being with someone else when they're suffering, sometimes with tragedies that are outside of anybody's control, sometimes with, you know, decisions they're making or whatever. But, yeah, it's a grace, too, to be let in like that.
[00:26:07] Speaker B: It's definitely awesome to be able to walk with people where they are on their journey and not just, oh, you need to be up here with me, but coming back. And because all the kids are different, all the adults are different, but having that relationship with them in the different ways.
[00:26:27] Speaker C: And I'm definitely mindful, too, of the times I think I screwed it up or didn't do as well as I could have. Because when you're working in the church, I feel like there's a big responsibility to not give someone a bad experience of church, to not be the reason somebody has a scar around their faith. Right. And so I feel like the responsibility of that a lot. And looking back over the years, I think the thing I regret is the times when I, like, I maybe listened well and maybe I even gave good. Okay. Advice if asked for it. But the times when I didn't be like, let's pray about it, where I didn't pray with someone, but I just. Do you know what I mean? Like, I didn't do the God talk. I was a good listener and I was a good role model or whatever. But like, I'd failed to pray the way I might have been. The only person in their life who could have carried that for them would have done so. That's always something I'm, I don't know, thinking about.
[00:27:21] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:27:22] Speaker C: Yeah. Do you have anything else?
[00:27:24] Speaker B: No.
[00:27:26] Speaker C: Should we ask Sarah another question?
[00:27:28] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:27:28] Speaker C: I think our next one is, well, this is similar, but this is more specific. So what do you wish adults knew about teens that they don't understand?
[00:27:40] Speaker B: What don't we understand?
[00:27:41] Speaker C: And how could adults support teens better, either in general or in the church or however you want to take that question.
[00:27:49] Speaker D: I had like a great answer while I was thinking about this, and now I'm looking back and I'm realizing I hate my answers. So we're gonna go. But I think adults need to give teens a little bit more grace. I think everyone's learning and growing. And one thing that I work with kids that are in kindergarten through fifth grade, and one thing that even there I realize a lot more is you can't as an adult or as someone who's in an adult role, you cannot demand respect from someone without giving it to them first. And I wish more adults would realize that it's not a power hungry role, but something that you want. You need to build a relationship, you need to be kind. Everyone is a person, no matter how small. And I sound like Dr. Seuss.
[00:28:44] Speaker B: I was just gonna say Horton, here's a who.
[00:28:48] Speaker C: Wisdom for the ages.
[00:28:50] Speaker D: I think it's really true.
I just. Especially the people who made such a big difference in my life. If you are wanting to make a difference in someone's life, you need to give people respect. And so I guess at church especially, don't act like you're better than someone else just because it's your first time there. They seem younger than you. Like, I guess everyone experiences God differently and teens are in a different time in their life than you are. And like when we're at church, like, obviously my phone is away, but sometimes I'll catch people looking at me funny because I'm talking to my mom about something. Or I'll be whispering in her ear and I'll be like, that was a really good thing that I really liked. And people look at me funny and I'm like, but I'm not gonna remember this in an hour when we get out of church. I wanna bookmark this now.
So I think one thing is just.
[00:29:45] Speaker C: That's a good point. Cause people could take a pad of paper and a pen out and probably nobody would notice if they were taking a note on something they really liked in the homily. But if you try to write it in your phone, people are gonna judge you.
[00:29:56] Speaker D: People are gonna judge me.
[00:29:57] Speaker C: Yeah. I never thought about that.
[00:30:00] Speaker D: So I think just especially when you're at church and you're wanting to support teens, smile, the sign of peace. It's the small things. If you've seen someone there for a few weeks, you can then come and be like, hey, I'm so and so. And I'm so excited to see you here and introduce yourself. But it can be really overwhelming walking into a new church or even if they've been to church for a while and you're just now realizing them. Like, don't go up and say something right away. Like, there's definitely some people that'll come up to me and they're talking to me, and I'm like, I have no clue who you are, but I'm so happy to have this conversation. But, like, other people would not love to do that.
[00:30:34] Speaker C: So I think, yeah, you're a lot more visible because people know you around the church as a leader.
[00:30:38] Speaker D: A lot of people know me. I don't know a lot of people.
[00:30:40] Speaker C: Yeah, right.
[00:30:41] Speaker D: It's not the same thing, but, yeah, that's just what I'm thinking.
[00:30:44] Speaker B: And I think that is for anybody. Not, like, just for teens, but we have a lot of young adults who are coming back. A lot of young families who are having kids that, you know, want to come back and have their kids baptized and not having that judgment of, like, oh, you're here in my seat, type of.
[00:31:05] Speaker D: One thing that really gets me is my mom has her very specific seat, and she will not let. Like, she'll let other people sit there. But, like, she'll go over and, like, be like, I don't know, understand, like, etiquette. And she'll go. And she'll sit, like, right next to them. And I'm like, mom, no, just move one back.
[00:31:21] Speaker C: And I think, but this is my pew. Yeah.
[00:31:23] Speaker D: She's like, this is my pew. This is where I sit.
[00:31:26] Speaker B: And I'm like, she's not alone.
[00:31:28] Speaker C: This is like a total Catholic thing.
[00:31:29] Speaker D: But I think we need to stop having so much of a. Like, this is my pew. You're gonna get the same experience. One pew back. It's okay.
[00:31:37] Speaker C: The worst is when that happens on, like, Christmas Eve, and there's, like, a lot of people there who maybe don't come all the time. And, like, I've seen people get, like.
[00:31:45] Speaker B: Really mad or first communion weekend.
[00:31:47] Speaker C: Oh, our first communion weekend. Really mad when somebody's in their pew and, like, that's my pew.
[00:31:52] Speaker B: Yeah.
They don't know better, but baby Jesus is born. Yay.
[00:31:57] Speaker C: I know. Let's have a little perspective here. Oh, my gosh, that's funny. I like what you said about eating to earn the right to be heard, though. I think that's, like, pretty central to working with young people. Just being in the church and realizing, like, yeah, you can't just assert authority when there's no relationship there to build on.
[00:32:20] Speaker D: So I started my internship because I was like, maybe I want to go into youth ministry. But as I've grown through it, I've realized that is not what my original goal. Well, it was my original goal, but what my calling really is. And I guess my question is if you could have chosen another career. Obviously, this is your calling, and sometimes you don't like your calling, but it's what you gotta do. So. But if you could have chosen another career, what would you have chosen for yourself?
[00:32:49] Speaker B: Go ahead.
[00:32:50] Speaker C: Okay. Well, I do like my calling, so I have no regrets. But before I started, like, when I was a college senior, so four years ahead of where you are now, I kind of thought if youth ministry didn't work out, like, this was one. And Michael, by the way, I had lunch with him in my senior year of college, and he's like, these are the three positions that are open in the diocese. And I've already called the pastors. No, he didn't do that, but he was like, you should really. I was personally invited into ministry, so that was a big part of ending up where I did. But I also thought about, like, looking into, like, graduate work and, like, maybe getting a PhD and going into academia. I had my. My college degree is in English lit and creative writing makes sense. So that's what I was thinking about doing, but I definitely ended up in the. But if people ask me, like, oh, if you couldn't do, you know, like, more of, like, in a lighthearted way. If you couldn't, you could do any other job in the world, what would you choose? I think it would be really fun to be a casting director for, like, TV or movies or plays or something like that, because I really enjoy noticing what's special about people and finding ways for them to shine. I think casting would Be really fun.
[00:34:04] Speaker B: That's really interesting.
[00:34:06] Speaker C: I have no idea what kind of a credential. You need to have that down.
[00:34:09] Speaker B: I don't have you pegged for that.
[00:34:10] Speaker D: You could do it now.
[00:34:11] Speaker C: I feel like I would love to try. Give that a try. Try sometime.
[00:34:15] Speaker B: I'm trying to think of when this airs because we have the Schnacky play. You can totally, like, pass to the snacky play. Okay, so my story is a little different.
When I was in, like, third grade, I wanted to be a.
What did I want to be?
[00:34:38] Speaker C: Astronaut.
[00:34:39] Speaker B: Marine biologist.
[00:34:40] Speaker C: Only marine biologist.
[00:34:41] Speaker B: An astronaut?
[00:34:42] Speaker C: No, that was gonna be my second guess.
[00:34:44] Speaker B: What.
[00:34:45] Speaker C: Oh, I think we've talked about it.
[00:34:47] Speaker D: So.
[00:34:47] Speaker B: Yeah. So in fourth grade, I wanted to be a marine biologist. And then when I was doing my whole, like, one application for college, I decided I wanted to do environmental science. So I wanted to be a scientist in, like, the world of, you know, hiking through trails and finding rare mushrooms and stuff like that. But when I got to college, it was not a very good experience for me, and I just didn't.
It wasn't necessarily the degree or the subjects I was going for, but I transferred out to Naz, and they had religious studies. And I was like, that sounds really cool. And I didn't really know, like, what I was going to do with it, but it was just really interesting for me to learn world religions. I think I had one Catholic class. The rest was, like, all world religions.
But I guess so that's how my calling ended up. And I was also invited by the diocese to apply. So that they must have had, like, a list of everybody.
[00:35:55] Speaker C: No, it's because our youth ministers. Our youth ministers kept having relationship with us even after we graduated.
It circled back.
[00:36:03] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:36:03] Speaker B: But I guess, like, right now, I think if I had another. If I had to go into another field, it would definitely be in the environment. And I would, like, want to be, like, a park ranger or something.
[00:36:15] Speaker C: I can see this for you.
[00:36:16] Speaker D: I don't. I can't see that for her. I don't.
[00:36:18] Speaker C: Oh, my gosh. You've never talked about camping?
[00:36:21] Speaker D: No, I. No, we talk about it all the time.
[00:36:23] Speaker B: I love the outdoors. I love, like.
[00:36:26] Speaker D: I just can't imagine you getting up at two in the morning to go rescue someone in a cheery mood, so mad at them, and be like, why did you not. Why did you do this? Like, this was just a bad show.
[00:36:36] Speaker C: So yum.
[00:36:38] Speaker B: It might take me a little while to get to. You.
[00:36:42] Speaker C: Just need more practice.
[00:36:44] Speaker B: I just love the outdoors. Like, it just Is. It's. It's. Yeah.
[00:36:48] Speaker C: All right.
[00:36:49] Speaker B: You asked me a question. I'm giving you my answer. Anything in the environment would be great.
[00:36:54] Speaker C: All right, I think that might be all of our official questions. Do you have any last things you want to say you didn't get a chance to say? You have, like, a whole. An actual microphone and a platform here.
[00:37:05] Speaker D: To tell the church, actually, you can talk.
[00:37:06] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:37:07] Speaker C: Whatever you want.
[00:37:08] Speaker D: Here's what I want to say. Okay. So one thing in the church is we went to NCYC and I heard this quote, and it's really stuck with me. It's not the one that you think it is, but it's a different one. And it was. A lot of people, young people in the church find walls where they should find pathways. And I think.
I don't know. I was in, like, seventh or eighth grade, and I was. I remember talking to you about this. I was so mad about so many things, and I was like. I was ready to get up and be like, no, I'm done. Because just. There's just so many things that, like, you can't seem to think of them in another way. But I think just around teenage years is when you really shape your own perspective on things. And a lot of people will get confirmed because that is what is expected of them and still get up and walk away and never step foot in a church again. And I think what is really important is to make sure everyone feels heard and respected and to figure out with young people how to find those pathways in a way that allows them to do the things they want to do. Like, I hit this wall, and then all of a sudden, it led me into becoming so involved in so many things when I was ready to get up and be like, I'm done. But I think it's just really important as an adult to remember, like, this really could be a make it or break it moment for someone. And you just don't know. Like, religion's just one of those things that can be so helpful but can also be so harmful in other ways. So, yeah, I like that quote.
[00:38:41] Speaker B: It's easy to, you know, have younger kids look up to you and have adults be able to see what you're doing. But the peer. The peer relationships is huge.
[00:38:54] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:38:55] Speaker D: I had someone come up and was just hanging out with me on Sunday while I was doing stuff, and I was just like. Like my age, and it wasn't who you're thinking, it was someone else. But I was, like, very surprised. I was like, oh, wait, like, I'M actually doing something good. It took me a minute there.
[00:39:12] Speaker C: I was like, they know who you are and they know you're like a safe person.
[00:39:17] Speaker D: I felt bad. I had to be like, oh, I gotta go do something now, like, send them back to where they came from.
[00:39:21] Speaker B: But I was like, oh my gosh, your aura. You have a good God aura. You're welcome. Well, thank you for sharing you and your thoughts and visions of what adults can learn from the youth of our parish.
[00:39:39] Speaker C: Should we end with a couple of I found a couple scripture passages for.
[00:39:42] Speaker B: Young people and I always forget that.
[00:39:44] Speaker C: Part of our so I've only got two of them. Who wants to?
[00:39:47] Speaker D: Do you want to?
[00:39:48] Speaker B: One of our quotes is from the first book of Timothy, chapter 4, verse 12. Let no one have contempt for your youth, but set an example for those who believe in speech, conduct, love, faith and purity.
[00:40:09] Speaker D: Our other scripture for today was from the book of Jeremiah. The word of the Lord came to me before I formed you in the womb. I knew you before you were born. I dedicated you, a prophet to the nations. I appointed you, Lord God, I said, I do not know how to speak. I am too young. But the Lord answered me, do not say I am too young. To whomever I send you, you shall go. Whatever I command you, you shall speak. Do not be afraid of them, for I am with you to deliver you.
[00:40:38] Speaker C: All right, I think that'll do it for today, huh, Sarah? Thanks, Ray. She's got to get to work. Right on time. Okay, we're good.
[00:40:45] Speaker D: All right, thank you, Sarah.
[00:40:46] Speaker B: Thanks for being here and we will see you all next time.
[00:40:49] Speaker C: Thanks, everybody. See you next time.
[00:40:53] Speaker A: Thanks for taking a faith break with us today.
Karen Luke and Anne Gallagher are lay ministers with the parishes of St. Catherine of Siena in Menden, New York, and Church of the Transfiguration in Pittsford, New York. More about our parishes, including weekly live streamed Sunday Mass, can be
[email protected] or transfigurationpittsford.org thank you to our special guest, Sarah, for bringing a young adult's point of view to our show. Engineering today is by Jeff Beckett. Join us for new episodes of Faith Break each week in Studio on YouTube or on your favorite audio podcast or music applied.
