Seasons of Marriage

[00:00:04] Speaker A: This is Faith Break, a podcast about recognizing God, moments in our everyday lives, with hosts Karen, Luke, and Anne Gallagher. In honor of Valentine's Day this week, Karen and Anne welcomed back their husbands, Jeremy and Brian, to reflect on the many seasons in marriage. What seasons have we experienced in our marriages? What seasons are we looking forward to? [00:00:38] Speaker B: Hi, everyone. Welcome to Faith Break. I'm Karen, Luke. [00:00:42] Speaker C: And I'm Ann Gallagher. [00:00:43] Speaker B: And we are joined with our husbands today for our annual Valentine's Day special. Happy Valentine's Day. [00:00:50] Speaker D: Happy Valentine's Day. [00:00:51] Speaker C: So this is my husband Brian. [00:00:52] Speaker D: Hi, I'm Brian. [00:00:53] Speaker B: This is my husband Jeremy. [00:00:55] Speaker E: Hello. [00:00:56] Speaker C: And yes. So this is an annual occurrence now because it's our second time doing it. So I guess now we always have to do this on Valentine's Day, but we actually had a lot of fun last year when you guys came on. So we are gonna have a little conversation today about the seasons of marriage, because this season on our podcast, we're talking about all the different seasons of life. And let's see, how many years of marriage do we have between our two couples? We've been married for 22 years. Yeah, just now. [00:01:26] Speaker B: And we just celebrated 19. So 38. Is that. Did I do my math right? Yeah, 38 between the two of us. [00:01:34] Speaker C: So I guess we're experts. [00:01:36] Speaker B: Although at mass today, we had a couple announce that they were celebrating their 58th wedding anniversary this week. Kudos to God. [00:01:47] Speaker C: Bless them. 58. That's a long. Let that sink in for a minute. [00:01:53] Speaker B: How old am I gonna be when we celebrate? How old are we gonna be? [00:01:57] Speaker C: It's too much time for this. All right, well, so we always start our podcast, as you guys know, by sharing our God moments. Where did we see God or feel close to God in the last week? I'm gonna put my husband on the spot. [00:02:12] Speaker D: Mine's easy. I teach high school, and I had a snow day this week. [00:02:15] Speaker B: Yay. [00:02:16] Speaker D: Yay, snow. [00:02:18] Speaker B: What did you do on your snow day? [00:02:19] Speaker D: Nothing. [00:02:19] Speaker B: Awesome. [00:02:21] Speaker C: That's not true. We actually did a bunch of stuff on snow. [00:02:23] Speaker D: I didn't do any work, though. [00:02:24] Speaker C: You didn't do any work for work. That's true. That's true. [00:02:28] Speaker B: You did fun work. [00:02:29] Speaker D: Yeah, well, I left my. All my correcting at school, so when I got. I wasn't expecting a snow day. So when I got one, I was like, well, I can't do anything. [00:02:35] Speaker B: All right, we're gonna jump to Jeremy. What was your God moment? [00:02:41] Speaker E: I think we. We adopted a cat recently, and this week, they kind of all started to get along. So that was a little bit of less stress in the household. [00:02:51] Speaker B: Cat number three. [00:02:53] Speaker D: Three. [00:02:53] Speaker B: Three. [00:02:53] Speaker C: You guys know you need to stop here, right? [00:02:56] Speaker E: Ooh. [00:02:57] Speaker D: Anymore? You're crossing over into crazy cat lady's hair. [00:03:00] Speaker C: Actually, Connor, there's enough cats. Connor laughed. [00:03:03] Speaker D: He goes, well, if we get one. [00:03:04] Speaker B: More, we each have one. I was like, no, no. And Stu. Oh, I shouldn't say stupidly. Whose idea was it? [00:03:11] Speaker D: Connor's? [00:03:12] Speaker E: Mine. But I'm surprised you went along with it. [00:03:15] Speaker C: Did you do the thing where, like, we're just gonna go to lollipop and see? [00:03:19] Speaker B: Yes, and we did find one, but it was really sick, and so it would need a lot of attention and care, and we just. We couldn't do it. And then the next. The following day, a friend was rehousing hers. [00:03:34] Speaker C: Oh, that's right. You two did my dad. Okay. Karen, how about you? [00:03:37] Speaker B: So mine was. I had two days by myself. Cause my kids did not have a snow day. You were working from home, but I was working from home. And so I was able to get a little reading done. And then the following day, Friday was my day off, and I read the entire day. [00:03:55] Speaker C: That's the best. I think you actually showed. [00:03:57] Speaker B: You send me a picture. I did send a picture. [00:03:58] Speaker C: And you had your cat and your blanket and your book. [00:04:01] Speaker B: Yep. One of the cats was right out. [00:04:03] Speaker C: Of it, and I was doing, like, the same thing, and my heart was. [00:04:06] Speaker B: The best, and I didn't feel guilty about anything. [00:04:08] Speaker C: So good. [00:04:08] Speaker B: No laundry until Jeremy started to come home, and I was like, oh, my gosh. And then I was, you know, look busy. I was trying to look busy. [00:04:17] Speaker E: You're allowed to rest and relax. [00:04:18] Speaker B: I know. [00:04:19] Speaker C: Holy napping. It's our theme. [00:04:21] Speaker B: All right. [00:04:21] Speaker C: And so I just had mine right now just before coming here, because we. It's. We're recording this on a Sunday. We just came from Mass at St. Catherine's and Karen and I were like, we have just enough time to pick up a cup of coffee at the local cafe. And we walked in and every. It was packed. And every single person in the cafe had also just come from our 1045. [00:04:42] Speaker D: Yes. [00:04:42] Speaker C: It was just a cool little church after church community and got to chat with a couple of people. And it was kind of just brought me some joy. [00:04:49] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:04:50] Speaker C: So that's my God moment. It's nice to be part of such a cool community. [00:04:53] Speaker B: Love it. [00:04:54] Speaker C: All right, guys. [00:04:55] Speaker B: Seasons. [00:04:56] Speaker C: Seasons in marriage. [00:04:58] Speaker B: Marriage. [00:04:58] Speaker C: What do we. How do we want to do this? How do we want. Do we want to go chronologically? Or do we want to just think about, like, what do you think was the hardest season in our marriage? Let's get that one out of the way first. [00:05:10] Speaker D: I don't know. [00:05:12] Speaker C: What do you do first? [00:05:13] Speaker D: Moving in was pretty hard for you. Not really for me. I don't really care. But I brought my stuff. You want to hide at your mother's until I put it all away. [00:05:23] Speaker C: That's true. When we came back from our honeymoon, Brian had been living with roommates and so we hadn't like brought all his stuff over yet. And I had a bit of a panic because I was in like a tiny one room apartment. [00:05:36] Speaker D: It was tiny, though. She was not tiny. [00:05:40] Speaker C: All of your stuff. [00:05:41] Speaker D: I had like six. She's making it sound like I moved a, like a five bedroom house into her, like, studio apartment. That's not what happened. [00:05:48] Speaker C: But it was all in a pen. [00:05:50] Speaker B: It was all the bachelor stuff, though. [00:05:52] Speaker C: Brian. It was like wires and computer parts. [00:05:56] Speaker D: I had a computer and a desk and clothes and she made it sound like I had like. [00:06:00] Speaker E: And everybody needs a box of old cables. You never know, right? [00:06:03] Speaker C: Well, one box maybe, but this was like a lot. It was just. It's just not true. [00:06:08] Speaker D: But anyway, I put that away. But I think first child, first. [00:06:16] Speaker C: I think first year of marriage was rough and first year of parenthood. [00:06:21] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:06:21] Speaker C: Because, you know, our oldest didn't sleep. [00:06:23] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:06:23] Speaker C: The entire time. Unless you were holding him. [00:06:26] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:06:27] Speaker C: Then he was a perfect baby. [00:06:28] Speaker B: That's good. [00:06:30] Speaker C: But it was like the adjustment. Right. Like I. [00:06:32] Speaker B: We were. [00:06:33] Speaker C: We had lived. I lived alone for years. And I kind of liked that. And I mean, I was happy to be married to you, but not all your stuff. Well, yeah. Cause listen, learning to live with another. [00:06:44] Speaker B: Person is not easy. [00:06:46] Speaker C: Easy. [00:06:46] Speaker D: Yeah. And. Yeah. And the sleeping with the friends. [00:06:50] Speaker C: And he is messy. Like you're stuff. He's not messy now. You're not. Because you've been really well trained. [00:06:56] Speaker B: Did you go through like, focus and. [00:06:58] Speaker C: The marriage saying, I'm not messy. [00:07:00] Speaker D: I just. I'm not the most unclean. I'm clean. [00:07:06] Speaker C: You are a clean person. [00:07:07] Speaker D: And I have clutter, if that makes sense. [00:07:12] Speaker C: I think there's an Ernie and a bird in both of these sets of marriages. And I think we kind of know who's. [00:07:17] Speaker D: At any rate. [00:07:19] Speaker B: Are you saying, like, I'm. I'm like Brian. Yeah. Jeremy's probably like. [00:07:23] Speaker C: Yeah, exactly. [00:07:24] Speaker D: And with the first. The first year of parenting, the baby that didn't sleep, like, I actually came out in the kitchen once and you were asleep. On the kitchen floor. It's like. You didn't. [00:07:35] Speaker C: You did that. Really? [00:07:36] Speaker D: Yeah. I had to wake you up. [00:07:37] Speaker C: Where was the baby? [00:07:38] Speaker B: I was holding the baby underneath you. I was. I. [00:07:42] Speaker C: In the kitchen. [00:07:43] Speaker B: No, you were just so tired. [00:07:44] Speaker D: Tired? Yeah. I told you to go to bed, and you're like, okay. [00:07:47] Speaker C: I. I have no memory of that. [00:07:49] Speaker B: I have, like, really? [00:07:51] Speaker C: Our children. [00:07:53] Speaker B: They were great as babies. [00:07:55] Speaker C: Sure. [00:07:56] Speaker B: Like, Emma was sleeping through the night at two months. Connor slept at night at, like, four. [00:08:02] Speaker D: They still don't sleep. Our kids still don't sleep. [00:08:04] Speaker B: Oh, our kids. Are they. [00:08:05] Speaker C: Do they. They have teenagers now. You can't even wake them up in the morning. Bridget's good at them. [00:08:09] Speaker B: What would you say that our hardest. [00:08:12] Speaker E: Probably the initial, you know, shortlifter, being married and shortly after having kids. It's just that adjustment. It's a huge change to your lifestyle and the way you've been doing things your entire life. [00:08:23] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:08:24] Speaker E: So you're trying to sort out the best way of moving forward. Yeah, it's. It's a big change once you get settled in and figure out what works for everyone and. But that first few months of anything is, you know, can be tough. [00:08:41] Speaker B: Yeah. Like, it doesn't. I think when we were in the moment, it felt tougher than it does now. I think there's just, like, a different. [00:08:50] Speaker C: Kind of, like, we didn't know how good we had it back then, now that we have kids and. Yeah, we always had jobs, but, like. [00:08:57] Speaker B: Yeah, we were saying a couple years ago, I don't even remember what we were talking about, but I was like, what did we used to do after. [00:09:04] Speaker C: Work before we had kids? [00:09:06] Speaker D: Like, we would anything you wanted. [00:09:08] Speaker B: But that was, like, the weird thing. I have no recollection of that, too. [00:09:11] Speaker D: There's a British comedian that talks about that. He said. He's like, I don't even know how I used to leave the house before I had children. Like. Like, he's like a. Like, you know, you'd say to your single friends, I'm. You know, what are you doing? They're like, oh. I say, I'm leaving now. And then I just walk out the door. He's like, yeah, I don't really remember that. [00:09:33] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:09:33] Speaker C: You know what's funny, though, is I think we actually spend a lot. We started spending a lot more time together as a couple, even after we had kids. That is true. Because we. I have, like, kind of different interests and, like, you like to do your game with your friends. And so, like, a lot of the time before we had kids, we would afterwards just kind of both do our own thing. [00:09:54] Speaker D: We would go do our own little hobby or hobbies. But I think after kids we like, we made a like effort to make sure that the kids went to bed. [00:10:04] Speaker C: Then we had time or. [00:10:06] Speaker D: Or we would make sure that we would go out once a week. [00:10:10] Speaker B: I think that's the key. We've done that too. [00:10:12] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:10:13] Speaker E: It's gotta make time. [00:10:15] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. [00:10:15] Speaker A: But. [00:10:16] Speaker D: But it's interesting because when you don't have kids like you. You have all of this time and you're like, all right, well we can spend time together later at some other time. And then you end up not spending that much time together. [00:10:25] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:10:26] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:10:26] Speaker B: I would say one of our other not major things, but I think the trying to deal with like the finances. [00:10:35] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. When we took that focus, that survey they have to do is for pre. [00:10:39] Speaker B: K. You don't have to do that though. But I think everyone should do it. [00:10:42] Speaker C: I thought that was part of. [00:10:44] Speaker B: No, just not everybody does it. No, no. But you should, if you're getting married, do focus. [00:10:49] Speaker C: Well, when we did. I don't know if it's even called that anymore, but it was like not a compatibility test. It's like pre marriage thing to get you talking about all the issues that might come up. But I think we were. It's weird. I think we were compatible in everything except for money probably. And now we're like. We never argue about money. [00:11:07] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:11:07] Speaker B: I want. [00:11:08] Speaker C: Actually I wanted to talk about one more difficult season. No, no, no. Well, it's a difficult season, but a great season because, you know, I want to talk about losing my mom in the fall because we have talked a lot about the sandwich generation and like, you know, our parents are getting older and having to take care of them. But when my mom had a car accident over the summer and we. She stopped being able to take care of herself. And now since her death, like we. You have taking care of my mom so well that it's just like she. Is she still the primary? [00:11:42] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:11:43] Speaker C: So I didn't even realize how much in close contact you were taking care of my mom in her later years until it had been like months since her accident. So she hadn't had her phone and she was still your number one contact. Yeah, like the most. Who's called. Is it who's called you the most or like. [00:12:01] Speaker D: So it goes to the top. [00:12:03] Speaker C: Right. So she's. And she's been gone for months now and she still like. I can't imagine how much I Think. [00:12:09] Speaker D: You'Re number two, let's say. [00:12:10] Speaker C: Am I number two? [00:12:10] Speaker D: I'm moving up. You're moving up. You're moving up. Let's say. Let's see here. Yeah, I'm number two. [00:12:19] Speaker C: I'm number two in Brian's phone. Behind my mom. [00:12:21] Speaker D: Behind your mom. [00:12:24] Speaker B: That's so sweet. [00:12:25] Speaker C: But, like, you did. I mean, going to the hospital, taking care of all the house stuff. There's so much business and things you have to do when someone goes. And like, I just can't imagine having done that without. So it's been. We've been in a really tough season, but we're in it together. And I'm just really grateful that you're here. [00:12:46] Speaker B: I've even said that to Anne. Not. No offense, I'm grateful you're here too, but I. I noticed that and I said that to you. I was like, man, Brian is like. [00:12:56] Speaker C: We were like a mass. And you went to take your aunts. [00:13:00] Speaker B: It was your aunts taking them to the hospital or something. I was like, wow. It was just. You just excluded. No. [00:13:08] Speaker E: What's exuded. [00:13:10] Speaker C: Exuded. [00:13:10] Speaker B: Is that the word? Yeah, this, like, care for Anne. It was very sweet to see. [00:13:15] Speaker D: Well, the idea of the sandwich generation, you have to take care of parents and cats. It's. [00:13:23] Speaker C: You know, it's a lot. [00:13:23] Speaker D: It's a lot. And it gets, you know, like my parents are still, you know, they're still around, but they're aging. My dad's in his 80s and my mom. Dad's. Mom's primary caregiver these days. But it's, you know, it's a. My sister lives close, so it's, you know, it is a sandwich. You gotta, like, take care of the kids and take care of your parents and make sure everything's done and. And try to live your own life at the same time. [00:13:54] Speaker B: Right. [00:13:55] Speaker C: And then, you know, a bit sager. Of course you have like, your teenage kids being like, I need a ride here. Oh, you didn't think to tell me that yesterday? Or right now. You need to go in. So just like the coordinating of all the schedules. [00:14:09] Speaker D: And my favorite is when two kids need to be in two different places at the exact same time. [00:14:14] Speaker C: That's fun. [00:14:14] Speaker D: And I'll just say to them, one of you is gonna be late and one of you is gonna be early. So you two choose which is which. [00:14:21] Speaker B: I think because of what we've seen with like, my. My grandpa lived with my parents for several years. Several years. And then just seeing it from some of our friends are Going through that. And with you guys, we've already started talking about it and, you know, trying to see. I think that's important that we have that communication now before it hits. [00:14:51] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:14:52] Speaker B: And trying to figure out, okay, like, what's gonna happen. But I think, you know, we're blessed because both of our families. We're close to both of our families. Right. [00:14:59] Speaker C: Yeah. And your siblings. [00:15:00] Speaker B: And our siblings. And I don't think that'll have that stress, but I'm sure that there'll always be stress with it. [00:15:08] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:15:09] Speaker E: But it's not always necessarily a bad thing. It's, you know, chance to spend more time with the family, and you can always put a positive spin on it. And, you know, having kids to look after and parents to look after, that's not. You know, some people might really enjoy that time. So it's. [00:15:29] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:15:29] Speaker C: I'm looking forward to when my kids are adults. I mean, I've loved every season of it. Of them when they're out of the. [00:15:36] Speaker B: House and I don't have to drive them anywhere. [00:15:39] Speaker C: Having an adult relationship with my kids, like, I can't wait to see the adults they're going to be so that I can have. Yeah. [00:15:47] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:15:48] Speaker C: That different relationship with them, you know, when they're in their own lives, you know, having made the choices for them. [00:15:55] Speaker D: You know, we're. We're kind of like, you know, liam. Liam turned 18, so we're. Oh, Lord Senior. And so it's. It's starting to. [00:16:04] Speaker C: It's starting to feel really real. [00:16:05] Speaker E: Yeah. [00:16:06] Speaker D: I mean, on that snow day, I sat outside for. I told you, I sat outside. [00:16:10] Speaker C: Yeah, you had a moment. [00:16:10] Speaker D: I shoveled the driveway, and it was that clean. You know, you can tell you're from western New York. [00:16:15] Speaker C: That clean, crisp, cold air. It feels so nice and cold outside. [00:16:18] Speaker D: So nice and cold outside. You just want to sit some. Sat outside and on one of the patio chairs for a while, just like, you know, thought about all the changes that are coming up. We really are changing a season for our family. I feel, you know, everything's going to change. [00:16:30] Speaker E: Yeah. [00:16:31] Speaker C: With my mom dying and Liam moving. [00:16:32] Speaker D: Out of the scene and my parents, you know, aging, and everything's kind of changing there. I just had. I just sat down and just thought about it for a bit because it was nice. Cold moment and. Yeah. So it's, you know, like, kind of like, turn the page, change, so. And not in a bad way. [00:16:48] Speaker B: That's. [00:16:48] Speaker D: That's the thing. It's not like. It's not like, oh, everything's Gonna change. It's terrible. It's. No, things are gonna change because life moves on. [00:16:54] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:16:54] Speaker E: And so things to look forward to. [00:16:56] Speaker D: Yeah. Yeah. So it was more. More in a good way. Like, things are gonna change in a good way. Like, Liam's gonna, like, you know, do the next thing, you know, and, you know, that's gonna change the dynamics of her family, and, you know, that'll be, like you said, having. I'm looking forward also to having, like, that. That adult relationship which is coming. Interesting. [00:17:16] Speaker B: We were at our favorite restaurant place to. Yeah, our favorite place to eat. [00:17:22] Speaker C: Your spot. [00:17:23] Speaker B: Our spot. And we were sitting at the bar, and Jer was talking to me, and I'm. I'm kind of just looking over his shoulder, and finally he's like, what are you doing? I have a tendency of, like, I can still listen and pay attention, but I. I do watch. [00:17:37] Speaker D: I don't know what that's like at all. [00:17:41] Speaker B: He's like, what are you doing? I'm like, there's a baby over there, and he's really cute. [00:17:45] Speaker C: That is totally what you do in restaurants all the time. [00:17:49] Speaker D: Literally all the time. [00:17:50] Speaker B: Today at church, we have one family. They have twins and then a little boy, and they're all under the age of, like, three. So cute today. And I just watched him, like, I missed the. I miss the baby. [00:18:01] Speaker D: Karen, do you get the. [00:18:01] Speaker C: Do you get the thing? [00:18:03] Speaker D: We're looking at something. Jeremy, move his head to get in your way. [00:18:06] Speaker B: No, he's just like. He'll just stop talking. He's like, I'll wait. [00:18:10] Speaker D: It's so funny. [00:18:10] Speaker C: Or, like, at restaurants, if there's. If it's a restaurant where there's TVs, I have to position him so that he's not facing a tv. Otherwise, I'll just be like, no. You feel me? Do you feel me? I know you do. Okay. Yeah. [00:18:24] Speaker B: It's an extrovert thing. It's just. [00:18:27] Speaker C: No, I can't. [00:18:30] Speaker B: If it bothers you that much, I'll try very hard not to do that. [00:18:33] Speaker E: It's all good. [00:18:34] Speaker C: Okay. All right. [00:18:37] Speaker B: Jer, what. What's your. I feel like, because we're all the extroverts, I want you to be able to have a chance to talk. [00:18:42] Speaker D: Okay. [00:18:43] Speaker B: What is. What has been your favorite season of marriage? I like that question. [00:18:54] Speaker E: I don't know if we have a favorite. Just. I like where. Like, where we are now in the present. And, you know the thing with the seasons, that everything's always changing and there's stuff to look forward to, but you know, there's obviously times in the past that have been great, you know, like remember them fondly. But just here now and being with your family and being with friends and like that's, you know, it's a good season to be in. [00:19:28] Speaker D: Yeah, yeah. [00:19:29] Speaker C: We're in a good spot. [00:19:30] Speaker D: Yeah. It's interesting because like I had that same thought about, about the favorite. I don't really have one. It's like whatever the present is, you just, you know, that's, you got, you're making the best of it. [00:19:39] Speaker B: Right. [00:19:40] Speaker D: And so. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I do like. [00:19:45] Speaker B: Well, did you say I like winter? [00:19:47] Speaker D: No, I, I actually do like winter as like a cold season. I'm a cold weather person. [00:19:52] Speaker B: Like, we're not really talking about that kind of season. [00:19:54] Speaker D: I do like where we are now. [00:19:56] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:19:56] Speaker C: And we're at the point where we can kind of like, I don't know, these years have flown by and we're, we're at the cusp of the next, you know, turning and to be able to start thinking about, you know, we just had a. Would I tell you, we talked with Pam about her. The season of the Second act. That was one of our upcoming recent episodes. [00:20:17] Speaker D: Whenever I get three days off, I want to retire. So I. [00:20:21] Speaker C: But you know, to talk to somebody who is like just. She's retired from her full time job but she's still working for the churches and stuff and it's like she, she had some great advice. She was saying to like write a list of things that you could possibly do. Not like necessarily to do, but like. [00:20:37] Speaker D: Things I could do. I've got games waiting to be played for when I retire so. [00:20:41] Speaker C: Well, that kind of stuff. But also just possibilities for like other. [00:20:46] Speaker D: Oh yeah. [00:20:46] Speaker C: Parts of yourself you could explore you haven't explored yet. Not just the games. [00:20:50] Speaker D: No, I'm gonna like. [00:20:51] Speaker C: I know you're gonna play games, but I could. [00:20:53] Speaker D: No, I, I thought about like doing like, you know, like volunteering at community centers and things like that. Like having game days there. [00:20:59] Speaker B: You know, just like I just want a hammock. I don't want to, I don't want to volunteer anymore. [00:21:05] Speaker C: I don't want to have to volunteer anymore. I'm not gonna volunteer. [00:21:07] Speaker D: It's really funny because they're like at work. At work. Like all of us, me and several of my work friends realize we're all retired. Like that Gen X gen, that early Gen X generation or, or I'm sorry. [00:21:20] Speaker C: Late Gen X or the youngest Gen. [00:21:22] Speaker D: X. Yeah, the youngest Gen Xers. We're gonna be all retiring within like 5 ish years of each other. You know, just in that same kind. [00:21:29] Speaker C: Of five years from now. [00:21:30] Speaker D: Not five years from now, but within. Within of each other. Right? [00:21:34] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:21:35] Speaker D: And we were like, there are teachers in the, like previous generation that, you know, maybe retired 5ish years. They sub all the time. They're in the building all the time. And all of us are like, like, no, not doing that, not doing that. I'll do something else. But like, when I'm done with this job, it's, I'm done with this job. [00:21:55] Speaker C: I want to do something different. [00:21:58] Speaker D: Which is, it's interesting because, you know, I just don't know why you'd want to like, you know, like he had a friend that retired a few years ago and he said, he said, if you see me in the building, call my wife. Something's happened, I'm confused and I need to go home. [00:22:18] Speaker C: That's so true. It is fun to think about. Like, well, we have upcoming. There are seasons we haven't experienced yet and those are gonna be fun. [00:22:27] Speaker B: Besides retirement, as a personal season, is there a season you're looking forward to as a couple? [00:22:36] Speaker D: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:22:40] Speaker C: Well, you know, I think we've never really been able to travel together, so that would be something fun to do. [00:22:46] Speaker D: By ourselves, just the two of us. [00:22:48] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:22:48] Speaker C: Or hey, maybe you guys could come and we could do a cool trip. [00:22:50] Speaker D: Yeah, that would be fun. [00:22:51] Speaker B: We have our list too. I think that's what we're. I think that's one thing that we had said that we wish we did more of. We, we've talked about that. Like that we had traveled more before we had kids as a couple. [00:23:05] Speaker D: No, but day tripping, you know, that used to be the travel, right? Go down the Finger Lakes for a day or two or go to Canada for a day or two. But in terms of like, let's go somewhere far away and stay two weeks and really see what's going on. Like, that's the kind of travel I'm looking forward to later on. [00:23:21] Speaker B: You know, my parents joked that when I graduated college they were gonna sell everything, get an 18 wheeler and just. [00:23:32] Speaker D: I actually know someone who did that. [00:23:33] Speaker B: Go back and forth and like, yeah, yeah. And I was like, you can't. Where are we going to have Christmas? And my mom was like, we'll have Christmas wherever you, wherever we end up. Right. And I was like, man, that kind of would be. Now that I'm thinking about, I'm like, that kind of would be fun. And then Connor Said the same thing to me. He's like, where would we have Christmas? [00:23:51] Speaker C: Well, because in the season we're in now, like, we're just. There's so much structure that's not, you know, our jobs and where our kids need to be for their activities. And, like, there just isn't a whole lot of freedom. [00:24:03] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:24:03] Speaker C: To imagine things being different than they are. And I think once your kids are grown and, you know, maybe work changes a little bit. They just. It's. Things open up. [00:24:14] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:24:15] Speaker C: Things open up or can open up. Not that I'm rushing it. No, me neither. [00:24:19] Speaker B: But I think we're going to be really cool grandparents. [00:24:22] Speaker E: Oh, God. [00:24:24] Speaker D: Same response. [00:24:27] Speaker B: I hope. [00:24:28] Speaker C: I hope we get to be grandparents someday. [00:24:31] Speaker B: I guess the way that I've grown up and being very. [00:24:34] Speaker E: It is something to look forward to. [00:24:35] Speaker B: Though, like, being very family oriented. I would hope that we have instilled that with our kids that they would want to have that kind of relationship with us that our kids have with our grandparents, with their grandparents and our parents. But I can totally wait for it. Trust me. I'm not old enough to be a grandparent yet, but it's like a different thing. You know, my parents are like, my mom always says it's so much cooler to be a grandparent than it was to be a parent. Yeah, you can go home. You don't have that responsibility. It's like, oh, I mean, yeah, we spoil our great nephew. So it's gonna feel a little bit like that. [00:25:15] Speaker E: That would be cool. [00:25:16] Speaker B: That'll be cool. [00:25:17] Speaker C: Well, I think we should be really proud of all the seasons we've lived through in our marriages and in our lives. And I think we should be really excited about the future seasons. [00:25:26] Speaker B: Yeah. So thank you to Brian and Jeremy for coming on and sharing your awesome wisdom with us. [00:25:34] Speaker C: Thanks for being good sports and for supporting us in everything that we are working on, too. [00:25:40] Speaker B: Well, happy Valentine's Day to everybody and we will see you next week. Next week. [00:25:45] Speaker C: Bye bye now. [00:25:48] Speaker A: Thanks for taking a faith break with us today. Karen, Luke and Anne Gallagher are lay ministers with the parishes of St. Catherine of Siena in Menden, New York, and Church of the Transfiguration in Pittsford, New York. More about our parishes, including weekly live streamed Sunday mass, can be found at Pittsford Mendon Catholic. Thanks to our special guests today, Jeremy and Brian. Faith Break is engineered by Jeff Beckett. Join us for new episodes of Faith Break each week in Studio on YouTube or on your favorite audio podcast or music.